You have probably heard me say this before, but I always wondered why the Lord brought us back to Utah. John and I loved Oregon. We were a "good" Mormon family willing to stay outside of Utah, and yet when we were deciding how to rank residency programs we felt we needed to put Utah first. We ranked Portland second. When we opened the letter that told us where we were going, we weren't surprised it was Utah. We felt that it probably would be. Not because of John's interview or anything, but the Lord was preparing us to leave our new "home." We were happy, and sad at the same time. I was worried, and one of my deepest worries would come true....
A year later when a friend's family would go through the match, they would only come back for one year to Utah and then move to Michigan. We wondered for them, "why the Lord would move them from the mid-west, back to Utah and then to Michigan." Their answer, or at least our answer to that question came that August. The residents mom would unexpectedly pass away. John and I thought, "how sad," and then later would think, "what a tender mercy of the Lord." He let them come home and have a few months with his family before his mother would then leave them, at least for the rest of this life.
I didn't know then, he had extended the same tender mercy to us, but the thought had crossed my mind more than once. I just prayed it wouldn't be needed. As I look back at the year that we got with my father-in-love. I am in deed grateful for this tender mercy. Oh, I miss Oregon. I miss it in ways that I never understood I would, but I would not trade anything for this time that we have had here.
There were tons of tender mercies leading up to my father-in-loves departure too. Things that some people might just think are happy coincidences. But we see the Lord's hand in them. Things like, my in-love's stopping by for just a minute, yet, dinner plans were canceled at the last minute, and we were able to go out to dinner with them. It would be the last time my kids saw their grandpa. I also feel that it was a HUGE tender mercy that the last time I would see my father-in-love would be on a night we went to the temple. Sam took out his endowments and we went to the temple together. We went to the temple where Ken had worked for so many years. He loved that temple. I remember looking over at him, when we walked in, our eyes met, and he just smiled at me. His huge big sweet wonderful smile. He was literally glowing he was so happy. I could feel his love for the women in his family, as he looked at us. It made me happy.
There is so many numerous tender mercies that also occurred with his actual departing from this life. I think tender mercies are just sometimes things that make you smile. I think Ken would have loved the story of his passing, because it almost seems comical and impossible in the details. and he was that kind of guy. He loved to laugh at weird or ridiculous things. Ken died on the last night of a Hawaiian Cruise. Not the second night or even second to last night. THEE last night. He died on his birthday. We all agree he wouldn't have wanted to be almost 67. He would have liked to have died on his birthday, exactly 67. He also died on a boat, which made it literally impossible to get him to a hospital. A place that he would have despised to die in. I find it a tender mercy that it might have just happened this way, so that we could smile knowing he would smile about it. It was also a tender mercy, that they went on the cruise. My Mother-in-love wanted to go to Hawaii. It was a dream come true, and she got to do it with him.
I know our matching in Utah was a big tender mercy 2 1/2 years before we knew we would need it. It has helped us to recognize the Lord's hand in more things in our lives. Tender mercies that let us know our Father knows, and loves us individually. He knows us, not because he watches over us now, but because he knew us before. I cling to this knowledge because when I know that he knows me, that he sees me, that he sends tender mercies my way, I know he will never leave me. I know he lives to be my comforter and friend.
Look for the tender mercies in your life. Especially during this holiday season. We should look for and acknowledge all that He does for us.
3 comments:
I love you and always love your insights on life!
Thank you Amy. You said it all so beautifully. Ken loved having you in our family and so do I! I love watching for the tender mercies that come every day.
Amy thank you for sharing this. You always have such a beautiful way of putting your testimony into your post. Im so glad you and your Family were able to make so many wonerful memories with your father in law. Im greatful tender mercies in my own life.
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